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Contributors Wanted

I have run this site for over two years now and have developed many readers from abroad and here in the Philippines and Expats, wannbe Expats, Foreigners interested in Davao or the Philippines in general and Filipinos.

I started writing as a journal of me, my family and my observations here. Then over time it turned into more of an information site about life in the Philippines and Davao and the cultural differences.

As I let everyone know on Monday’s article, I am planning to move back to America. Many readers would like to see this site continue. I can continue to write, some about my life being restarted in America, about the process of getting Elena to America and then the cultural and life differences she will experience in America.

What I need is Foreigners and Filipinos to contribute articles about life in the Philippines and especially Davao and cultural information about the foreigner/Filipino relationships.

I basically make no money on this site and the few donations I have received and the little I have made from advertising has not even covered the cost of keeping this site on the internet. Because of this, I cannot offer any monetary payments for writing. I will put any advertising for any sites a writer owns or advertises. This site and my writing has become part of me and I get pleasure from the many readers comments. It proves to me that there is value in American in Davao for many people.

At first, articles can be emailed to me, and once I see the author and their articles are a good fit and do not need any censor or editing, I will give the writers a direct login to the site to publish.

As you see, my articles vary about cultural differences, human interest stories, food and life issues, relationships and cautions. Recipes, native remedies and other news items are wanted. I just will not allow political writings or insulting information about Expats or Filipinos. I have many times written with respect where I could have written differently insulting people or the country. This is what I want to continue.

PLEASE HELP me keep American in Davao alive and something for all to read.

38 Responses to “Contributors Wanted”

  1. Sandy says:

    So are you going to continue this in the States? Will it be titled an American in Las Vegas? (smile)

    • Bruce says:

      Sandy,
      I was thinking of continue blogging. Maybe “Ex-Expat in Vegas”
      I hope to beable to continue this site with help from other expats here writing articles for my site.

  2. Sandy says:

    By the way what is the time difference between you and Vegas?

    • Bruce says:

      Sandy,
      Vegas is 15 hours earlier than here in the Philippines. 8am Monday here is 5pm Sunday in Vegas. It was easier calculating the time difference with my mom in Florida since it is 12 hours, except when you are on Standard time then it is 13 hour difference in Florida and 16 hours there in Vegas.

  3. Sandy says:

    Can I ask you a very personal question? Why did you not marry a girl from the States? This mess you are facing would have been so much easier. I can’t believe there was no one for you in the States. Just an observation.

    • Bruce says:

      Sandy,
      I tried meeting ladies for over 10 years in Florida before looking for an Asian lady. As you know, a man can only have a chance if the lady is 8-10 maximum younger. Most have a house, kids, a good job and not looking for love but better financial freedom. I made a decent living but was not upper class. I tried to hide my income and most were interested in seeing my tax return before a second date. Of the poorer women I met, I was not in the financial level or willing to support her and her many kids. Plus there is so much emotional baggage from past relationships.

  4. sandy says:

    Your wife has no kids? Why do do you say only a chance if lady is 8-10 years younger? A bit confused here. I don’t get it when I dated the last thing on my mind was money. Not everyone is out for that. I just find it interesting of all the people I see daily there was not one here for you. I don’t know anyone who has gone outside as you did to find a wife. Interesting though. Glad you are happy now.

    • Bruce says:

      Sandy,
      No, neither my wife or I ever had kids of our own.
      Maybe it is where I lived. In SE Florida everyone was into money and showing off. Reminded me of New York mentality. Then I was a little choosy. Many single working moms treated their kids as a friend and the kids had no respect for her or anyone she dated. One time I was dating a lady and she was out, I reprimanded the kid and he looked up and replied “Who the F_ck do you think you are, your not my dad.” That was last time I dated her. I also look at relationships as a team and many women I met were not team players. If you like, I can give you a list of men married to Asians. I can also link you to many of their sites.

      • sandy says:

        Can I ask you why neither of you have or maybe did not want any children of your own? I do have to agree with you most young kids are very disrespectful. They need to learn proper manners but they don’t and most parents don’t seem to care. I had a friend a few years ago who refused to discipline her kids when she came over, they would run through our home destroying everything in their paths. My roommate caught them jumping on the couch and that was the last time they were allowed in our place. I was taught to respect my property and others also.

        • Bruce says:

          Sandy,
          I was single most of my life and in my views, it is best if married to have children. Now, it would be a miracle, I had a vasectomy years ago and Elena had a hysterectomy two years ago. As we say, I do not have the ingredients and she does not have the factory.
          I think we will need to meet for more than just coffee, you have so much interest and I have so much to say.

          • sandy says:

            I am so curious about your life I suppose. Please don’t think I am prying. S You wife was never married before you?

          • Bruce says:

            Sandy,
            Elena was married once before. One day she came home sick from work and found him in bed with another woman. She packed her things and walked out. She got an annulment (divorce). She was single for a few years before ever thinking of a relationship again. With the history of Filipino men cheating, she did not want another Filipino.

  5. Seth says:

    Bruce,

    I think we are in the same boat here. After my divorce I dated for 6 years with American women. It seems that they were all the same. In the first fifteen minutes of conversation they were asking what you do for a living. I work in the oilfield and where I live everyone thinks that is “big money”. I got worn out being treated like a “meal ticket”. Then I happen to meet Ginalyn in a chat room. Neither of us was looking for a relationship other then friendship. Things developed over time and we are now married. I would not trade my Filipina wife for 100 American wives. Now that we have been married for almost 2 years, I can see many many differences in moral standards. I treat her like I treated my ex, like a queen, but the difference is she treats me like a king. She doesnt expect or demands extravegant gifts and appreciates the little things that I do for her. Because she appreciates the little things she often recieves big gifts also.

    I am not saying that American women are all bad, just the ones I kept dating, LOL. It could be that I have become calous, but I can honestly say that everyone that mets Gina loves her. I couldnt say that about my American girlfriens or ex-wife. Are there challenges of having a mixed marriarge? YES. Is it worth it? YES. So we as men should not have to defend ourselves for seeking companionship from abroad. I feel that American women should start questioning WHY we look abroad. IF American women would possess the same character that we have found in our ASIAN brides then we might not have to look to Asia to find our life partners. I am very proud to have an Asian bride and I encourage all my friends that have divorced their gold digging American wives to look to the EAST. A wise man once told me that buiding a good nest egg greatly depends on the chick in the nest. My Filipina wife is so used to doing without that she doesnt need 20 pair of shoes and 30 handbags. She much prefers to have less material things and a bigger savings.

    Seth

    • Bruce says:

      Seth,
      You are right about what I found in dating American women.
      About Filipina or Asian ladies, there are as many good storied as bad. There are many young ladies that look for older American men. Marry them and come over to the states. Then after the two years and their greencards are secure, divorce there Grandpa husband and find a young stud to run off with using the proceeds they got from the divorce.
      Here in the Philippines, there are also good stories and some where the lady gets the house and lot and then kicks out the old man or has him deported on a trumped up story.

      • sandy says:

        Amen Bruce! Seth not all us American women are gold diggers. It seems you just happen to meet the few who did not care enough about you to want a relationship. Money is not the sole reason American women date. My husband was as poor as a church mouse when we dated but I loved him and now we are doing awesome. Please don’t make it like we are all bad. Women can say that as you get older all you want in someone who makes you feel young again so you hook up with younger women. I love my husband, poor, fat , bald, whatever comes my way with him, he is all mine. S P.S I do have 25 pairs of shoes. 🙂

    • Billy Escobar says:

      As a Filipino male i don’t agree with these generalizations. That all American women are Materialistic. It’s more true generalize that many “Americans” or Westerners in general are materialistic. Hollywood culture permeates throughtout the world. I believe that race has nothing to do with how materialistic a certain group is but what is the social standing of their society. Japanese,Chinese and Korean women who are “Asian” can be very or even more materialistic than your average american woman. Alot of it has to also do with upbringing but that is dependent on the individual and everyone’s different.
      Some people can understand Necessity and luxury.
      Your going to throw out the question for American women to ask then you should also throw out the question of why Asian women are looking outside as well. As for the hand bags and shoes question you must have never heard of Imelda Marcos cause that attitude is not restricted to western women.
      What if the Philippines wasn’t a 3rd world country and the women didn’t have to look so far for financial/future stability? Everything filipinos look for in terms of Material, Education and stability has come from outside the country. If a filipino could have a good job, he would stay home no need for oversea workers. If a filipina could find a stable husband she would look locally. Not much opportunity, its the way the cookie crumbles. This is a major factor and not so much the sweeping generalizations that Asian women are better wives. Women are survivors and they will adapt to the situations, conditions and environments they live in.

      • Bruce says:

        Billy,
        I would love to see the Philippines get out of 3rd world status and see what they can accomplish. But with the Government, business owners keeping the Filipino in a poor condition and the over population, I do not see it happening.

  6. jeff says:

    Sandy, I belong to several groups that are based in the philippines run by expats. (Just FYI) I am in the states myself married to an American woman. Every one of the guys there are late 50’s to 70’s in age and their wifes are late 20’s to 40’s. The guys I speak with mostly have 30 years difference between themselves and their young wife. It is the norm over there and it is why most guys seek an asian wife. Bruce has 12-13 years between himself and Elena. Most in my groups will admit that their wives are too young for them but they have good relationships, they are retired and enjoying life. Like Bruce said to me once, “the Filipina gets a better life and the guy gets a young gal”.

    • sandy says:

      Jeff, You are saying the men in America have wives 20+ years younger than them. That is what I said. I don’t know about seeking an Asian wife, I am confused with your post. Who is seeking younger women, Old American men or men who don’t seem to be able to find an American wife? Sorry just confused as to what you are trying to say. S

      • Bruce says:

        Sandy,
        Many men like Asian ladies for their more traditional views. The younger ones or men still working bring them back to their home country and the retired men move here. Many of the Filipinas become Americanized and do not want to come back. I know of many who moved to the Philippines after the husband retired and are waiting for their husband to die and then move back to America.

    • sandy says:

      Jeff, the young gal might be accurate, but what happens to her when she gets old. Trade in< S

      • Bruce says:

        Sandy,
        Once they get old, and if the never lived in America and received citizenship just stay and either live in the “Big” house their husband built or while husband was alive developed a small business to support them.

    • Bruce says:

      Jeff,
      Thank you for your comment. You are right, most have good relationships, but I wonder if the man loses his money, how many of the Filipinas will stay, walk out, or start looking for a foreigner with money.

  7. Ben says:

    Bruce:

    Being married to a wonderful Filipina myself, she and I have had our share of the negative attitudes that are directed at some interracial marriages. My wife and I have been hurt several times by the insults. But together, we have agreed that we DO NOT have to defend our marriage. No one should be expected to defend their marriage.
    I am in my second marriage. My first marriage was with an American, and it was an experience that I never want to relive. I certainly am not implying that all American women are bad. I am simply expressing my own experience. I do know, however, that there is a trend in American nowadays that is unequal to how marriage was viewed when I was a lad growing up.

    My Filipina wife, MaryAnn, has brought joy to my life. She has helped me to heal emotionally. I had lost everything I had worked for in my first marriage. And because of that, when MaryAnn and I were first married I was unable to offer her but very little of the finer things of life. MaryAnn and I have had to dig and scratch and work long hours just to get to where we are today. And I thank God daily that things are now beginning to look much better for us.

    We celebrated our third wedding anniversary this January 2007. I have no regrets for my making the choice to marry a Filipina lady [MaryAnn]. I am happy I did. We both are happy.

    I wish you all the best with your move back to American, and I really hope things work out for the very best for you and Elena. I believe they will. Blessings to you both.

    • Bruce says:

      Ben,
      First, Belated Happy Anniversary. I am glad you both are so happy and I wish you many more happy years together.
      Thank you also for the good wishes for my move.

  8. jeff says:

    Sandy, Most of the guys I converse with that live in the Philippines are like Bruce. American men. They went on dating sites for Asian women. Got to know them on line. Went there from the US. Married their Filipina and have either came back to the states with them until retirement, then moved back to the Philippines or just married and stayed there. One friend just retired from here and moved to Roxas City, Phil. in November. His Filipina wife is 29 he is 62. They seem to have a great relationship. With his social security they live quite well there. Not rich but comfortable. They are talking about starting a family. Another guy just posted he and his wife are going to adopt a child. He is 59 she is 29. They are very happy. Very common over there. The women are not all gold diggers there but some are. I have herd those stories too.

    • sandy says:

      Jeff,

      Interesting and thank you for clearing that up for me. I try to read a lot when on a break and sometimes get things mixed up.

      • jeff says:

        Sandy, no problem. I try to read as much as I can also about the Philippines. My wife and I have talked about there or Belize for retirement purpose. Both places, if you have a decent retirement income, you can live very comfortable.

    • Bruce says:

      Jeff,
      As I have posted many times, there are as many good stories and horror stories here. Some retired expats want children to add to their retirement social security. Then since daycare is covered in part, many hire a domestic helper, call her as a nanny on their taxes to get that money too.

  9. And then there is me 😉 Swedish guy at 39 who have the similar experience as Bruce with dating women. In fact I gave up several years ago. My passion is travelling the world so I guess that is part of the reason I didnt get settled.
    Anyway 10 years ago I was just a nice goodlooking guy…hehe. Not much money. Then I got a good IT-job as a system developer. Money and a good job never changed my way with Swedish (or western women if you like). The last 10-15 years I have been totally uninterested in them and yes I lived together with one for 3-4 years during the 90’s. Even if I there might be something wrong with me too of course, I am fine. I prefer to settle with an Asian lady.

    • Bruce says:

      Stefan,
      We all have our needs and wants. Some like chubby woman, some thin, some tall, some short, blonds, brunets. What ever makes you happy is what we are all looking to find.

  10. sandy says:

    Well I better get back to work so no one breaks my knee caps. Have a great day or night depending on where you are located. S

  11. Gene says:

    Hi Sandy and Everyone,

    Just for fun, I’m going to jump in here—in defense of Bruce’s thinking and decision on marrying an Asian lady rather than an American girl.

    I am also an American male. Married to a wonderful Filipina and living in the Philippines.

    Everyone has different taste in cars, clothing, lifestyle, and yes, in women too.
    I must agree whole heartedly with Bruce’s assessment of the available “stock” of women in the states.

    There are gold diggers here in the Philippines too. For the most part they are easy to see. They are mostly the ones that are out with the foreigners in Angeles City that are so old they can hardly walk.

    They are not so easy to spot in the states. In the states, finding a good wife has worse odds than gambling in a Las Vegas casino.
    Only difference is that when you loose in Vegas you can count your losses. But when you loose in marriage in the states, you end up paying the rest of your life.
    Simply put, the odds are much better here.

    I’ve been married and lived here seven years now and would never dream of making a change…

    • Bruce says:

      Gene,
      Thank you for commenting. I am you are happy and found the right lady for you. I never said all American ladies are not marriageable and I have never said all Filipinas are out for a foreigners money either. Keep the faith.

  12. sandy says:

    Silly, I know what an annulment is. I live in Vegas. (smile) S

  13. Evelyn says:

    hi Bruce,it’s so nice to hear that you are thinking of coming back to your native land…
    Anyway, quite an interesting topic here and i’d like to make a little comment..
    I somewhat agree and like the rationale of Mr Billy Escobar that being materialistic is an individual’s choice..It is really dependent on the individual be it American,Filipino,Korean,Italian..In fact i see a lot of my countrymen here in California who are very materialistic..A lot of them here owned Lexus cars/SUVs and big houses with big television sets while most Americans live in comfortable houses with old television sets and live a simple life.
    And i also observed that a lot of Vietnamese, I live close to the little Saigon, own expensive cars like the BMW and Mercedes cars/suvs not to mention their signature bags —LVs and Coach bags etc etc…
    Well,my ten cents worth of comment

    • Bruce says:

      Evelyn,
      Even here there are people who are materialistic. The more you have the more you feel the need to show other people.

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